TToT: The Don’t Go Into the Light Edition

zoe

…And I quote  Josie: “We need to order you up some good days PDQ!”

                            Me: “Yes please.”

I’ve been painfully honest (well for me anyway) the past few weeks about my health struggles with some neurological symptoms related to my original illness. Walking, getting out of chairs, not falling… have been a struggle. No one seems to understand what’s going on so I’m going in for what I lovingly refer to as the crap-shoot (crap being the operative syllable) treatment. (Have I mentioned I’ve been kinda cranky lately?)

I’ve been getting a series of IV infusions over the past few weeks. Despite the efforts of my insurance company to the contrary, it went well last week. But hey, that was a whole week ago. I actually started feeling some stronger and thinking … “hmmm… maybe this will turn around… chuck one more life onto the pile.” I even admitted it in print! GO FIGURE!

Then something happened . 2cc’s into the infusion and I was heading down the brightly lit tunnel. It’s amazing how fast your life turns around. I had a reaction that sent me into shock and the next thing I knew I was looking at the business end of a crash cart and a team of 7 professionals all at once saying things like:

Nurse one: “Stay with us now”

Nurse two: “is still she out?”

Me: “No, I’m not, so be careful not to say anything too damning. Ouch! That stings huh? What are you shooting into me?” 

Doctor now arriving: ” Something to bring you down, and then we’ll fill you full of steroids to make you hyper and so agitated you can’t sleep. And then later on we’ll give you all the caffeine you want!”

Me: “Haha… Do my eyes always roll like this in my head or am I just happy to see you?” 

Doctor: “It’s both right? You get snarky when this happens huh? ” 

Me: “Sorry. It’s the steroids talking, although you shouldn’t mislead all these nice people into thinking this isn’t our usual witty repartee.”

After some time and stabilizing, talk of transferring me to inpatient ensued. I spent the night heaving, and trying to keep my eyeballs from falling out (well okay,there was probably no real danger of that happening but that’s what the migraine felt like.)

The next morning, my friend the Doctor returned. (He really is an awesome guy.)

Doctor: “Hey kiddo, you look like hell. Any more heart problems?”

Me: “Yeah, it keeps beating. Can I go home?”

Doctor: “You’re asking?”

Me: “Don’t start with me, you.”

I got home earlier today. Doug was happy to see me. He had spent the night with our neighbors. unnamed (28) Oh, yeah, I cut my hair. Surprisingly this is not the first time I have left the hospital with a new hairstyle. The migraine was so bad I figured taking ten inches or so off my tresses could only help. Surprisingly it did! I still have a headache but it definitely helped.

So let’s take a tally shall we? That kinda rhymes… yes, I’m still a little punchy…

1. People in my circle. Internet and Real life.

2. There is potential for treatment that could keep me mobile. Even if we have to figure out a different kind.

3. A really responsive emergency team.

4. My doc.

5. My eyeballs did NOT fall out.

6. Have I mentioned Douglas?

7. I don’t mind having short hair again. I find I don’t get dizzy rinsing it out in the shower… hidden benefits.

8. Remember the fruitcake?  IMG_0601 Well who knew that Rumple guy would be so gratitudinous? I mean it was just a bunch of flourescent fruit, sugared into petrification and baked into a brick! What a lovely guy. He wanted to thank me so that when he said something like, “I may have gone overboard in making you a few cd’s of music to sample,” I thought he made two maybe three cd’s… Well the package came yesterday from the warmer climes of Kentucky. It was in shock and covered in snow on my doorstep… and it contained this… unnamed (25) unnamed (26)

Amazing , yes? And to top it off… each has a typewritten contents page! Who knew Mister-Current-Events-Scare-the-Bejesus- Outa-You-With-the-Scary-Stories was such a sweetheart!? Ok, he had kinda leaked it out, but still! Amazing!

9. That despite very high winds, snow deeper than a foot over the course of the past few days, there has been no nasty sleet or freezing rain to muck up the works.

10. I am also grateful that my internet connection is back for a bit tonight at least long enough to type this out!

Have a good weekend and thanks for letting me vent … I really gotta get some better stuff going. cuz I’m sick of hearing myself kvetch, but I can’t seem to help it right now.

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54 thoughts on “TToT: The Don’t Go Into the Light Edition”

  2. Damn.
    I’m so glad you have a doctor with a sense of humor.
    I’m glad your eyeballs are intact.
    Oh, and that you are actually alive and able to tell us about your new haircut.
    Damn.
    That Rich is quite an enigma, too. What a sweet thing to do! Wish I thought of it. 🙂

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    1. OMG Christine, now its happening on my site with you! I lost this twice!

      Yeah, that Richard is an enigma. Good company ! Im in the midst of a morning space in my schedule and listening to the first cd . Its awesome!

      Every now and then someone mentions the hair and I have to remember its gone. Its really curly again. It is very straight and heavy when longer so this is quite the contrast. Chemo hair I guess. Funny it always stays gray long or short though!

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  3. Okay first,Richard is pretty amazing and I bet those cd’s were quite the treat.

    Also…you sound a lot like me with my pain management doctor….who one time woke me up asking who my cardiologist is. (at the time I did not have one) I said, What the hell is your problem I don’t have one you know that. Needless to say after that event I had one within two days.

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  4. Well, well, well…what some folks will do for attention! LOL You needed a night away from home THAT much Ivy?:)
    It always sucks when we hear about things that happen after the fact. Ya know, when people are alright and nothing really, really bad happened but very worrisome just the same, Missy!!
    Happy that whatever event you just experienced, resoved on the “positive” side. Here’s to progress on effective treatments going forward.
    I will 2nd Christine’s sentiment – glad the eye orbs stayed in your head:)
    Now about Doug. He’s going to expect you to make this little episode up to him. In a big way!

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    1. You know now that the steroids are wearing down my inner Clark is back and I so regret this freaking post! It is so not my way to go for full disclosure. I wouldn’t be surprised to find it gone soon. I did that once before but caught a bit-o-hell for it… nothing like bit-o-honey btw.

      So does letting Doug be totally underfoot and practically up my ass count as making it up to him?

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    1. no please no worries. This is part of why I have a hard time with disclosure.;.. I WIN! I can win a lot if I needed too! Unfortunately. Thanks for the kind thoughts! and Welcome to TToT!

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    2. Ivy will never make you feel like you don’t deserve to kvetch about whatever your personal complaint is, Lisa, no matter how insignificant you might think it is. Everybody’s reality is everybody’s reality.

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  6. Kvetching is not only allowed but encouraged, you can add to your list that this is a great, safe place to do that! Damn, that was a scary episode there, as I mentioned to you earlier, you have used up more lives than any cat I know! I think it’s safe to say that God isn’t ready for you yet, so you best just hang in there missy. I loved this little dialog with the doctor, I’m certain you pretty much call the shots about coming and going when you want. We are going to be circling around you with prayers for strength and energy in this month ahead, I hope you can feel it soaking in. Three cheers for little Douglas, nothing beats a happy homecoming! That CD collection is amazing, what an awesome, thoughtful thing to do! Now back to our regularly scheduled WWF knock-out… oh, that’s right, we are working today, ugh. Oh well, the time passes quickly… see how much I am getting done? :-))

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      1. Ok so I couldnt resist that… Im weak what can I say? My doc and I once had a conversation that I posted on my old blog about me being a bit like Elvis in that I get to call when I leave the building… amazing guy him… Elvis not my doctor… just kidding! He is the best. I am so lucky to have him.

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      2. This made me laugh so hard, Ivy! Indeed I am the poster child for adult ADHD and managed to derail my work train several times in the less-stressed pace of Saturday catch-up at the office. I was pleased with the amount of paperwork I managed to shovel through, Monday will feel a bit more organized and hopeful… at least until 10 AM or so. I’m glad you survived your work today too, is so nice to be done with it and head for home!

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      1. No Lisa! Its still at my shoulders even with that much gone. It has returned to curly however now that it isnt weighted down any longer. It feels great! I do not miss it. Funny the nurse had the hardest time of it… I would be okay shaving my head … it grows back.

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      2. If I could win the lottery I’d gladly give you half so you wouldn’t have to deal with those stresses as well, and if I could clone Papa Bear, I send one of him your way too… he is the most kind, care-taking, sensitive man I’ve ever met! In fact if I could clone him we wouldn’t need to win the lottery, we could just open a clone-sales store and live off the huge profits! :-))

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  8. Oh, wow. I’m so glad you lived to tell the tale. (And, as others have also stated, that your eyeballs are intact.)

    Rich is going to have to start a softer, gentler blog soon if he keeps this up. That must have been some epic fruitcake!

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  9. Sounds like quite an ordeal you went through. I hope they get to the bottom of it soon, because every hospital stay just takes more and more out of you, you know? Thank goodness for the neighbors who took care of poor Doug, who was no doubt beside himself without his mommy.

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    1. Speaking of ordeals! Look who’s up and blogging! So nice to see you here!!!! HOW’s The new hardware?

      I love my neighbors as does doug.They take him to their house and he sleeps in a king sized bed with them (on top of Mike despite the extra room!) He sleeps in the middle of every bed he gets on…

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  10. I’m with Josie. You kvetch away and don’t ever think you need to hide it anywhere – least not from any of us.
    I had no idea you had ten inches of hair to lop off – I covered that in an earlier comment here.
    I laughed out loud at your eyeballs popping out part because that was absolutely something I would say and your delivery, even though merely words on a page here, was impeccable.
    I do not know Rich very well yet, but I suspected he must have a soft heart in there somewhere because how else would he be intertwined with all of the good people in this circle? I think we should have a fruitcake throwdown and get Rich to judge. Like someone else said, I wish I’d thought to send you such a lovely thing. Clearly, it’s time for me to start collecting addresses…
    I’m glad you’re home and I’m glad Doug is there to get underfoot, as long as he doesn’t bowl you over. We are sending you lots of love and prayers so open up and let ’em in!

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    1. I think I give the impression of short hair in my writing! lol! Funny I thought of you that way too until I saw a photo of course! I am a short haired gal now!

      My eyeballs remain intact.

      I remember you saying you wanted a better recipe for a non toxic fruit cake. the one I made for RIch I turned traditional on because it was what he wanted but I usually use diced dry fruit and nuts in it if you want the recipe. Its vegan. It was originally called poor man’s cake because it has hardly anything in it and it was developed during the depression …. so no eggs or dairy… it also adapts really well to gluten free as needed. So if you want the recipe I am happy to share it.

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      1. Yes, please send it to me. Zilla actually loves fruitcake, but now that we know she can’t have the dyes in that radioactive fruit, I need another recipe. Dried fruit and nuts sounds exactly like what we’re looking for. Sounds perfect.
        As for the long hair thing on me…keep in mind that the photos you saw were twelve years ago. About six months after our wedding where I had that enormous head of up-do-ed hair, I lopped most of that off and got a sassy little bob up to my chin. I also cut my hair way short back in September, so that is not my now hair. Although I am actively growing it back out because long is just better for me. I’m in that most awkward of stages – growing out and too long to be short but too short to be long. There will be no photos until my hair resumes a more reasonable style. My stylist (doesn’t that sound pretentious as hell) said two more cuts and I’ll be back to long and able to put it up, which is honestly what I miss most. I hate not having the option of getting it up off my neck.

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  11. Well, clearly I need to become better friends with Rich Rumple. I can pass on the fruitcake, though.
    I wish I had a better image of you in my head. I definitely didn’t picture long hair. Glad you feel better with short.
    Are you always so nimble-minded upon coming to? I am truly impressed and very glad your eyeballs stayed in.

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    1. You know what it is? Its not sharpness of mind as much as of tongue. My inhibitions go to hell in a hand basket… I get really agitated on certain meds and steroids… thus why I am so snarky in such situations. I will text you a long haired version…

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  12. Perspective, huh?
    Been a bit wrapped up and short-sighted at my end, that’s for sure, but I’m glad you’re out and alive and…for REAL? 2ccs? Wow! At least the doctors know what NOT to give you another time.

    Love your snark. And your not snark. And just you in general.

    (and that you outed Rich as being a bit of a sweetie, really. That was a delight 🙂 )

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      1. Different lots, but briefer and less sucky in some ways, perhaps more in others. Adunno, Just glad to be coming out of it, and am laughing a little on the inside at you and Kristi yelling at one another.

        Rich…wonderful human being 🙂

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  13. Sorry you went through this horrific event. It would be nicer if things went better. Then you could stop scarding us half to death.

    Blessings and Bear hugs to you and the dog (if the dog can handle it).

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      1. You can handle it. As a group of British guys put it, “We get by with a little help from our friends.”

        Judging from the comments here, I would say you’ve got a lot of friends who will help you with this, Ivy.

        And then there’s the dog.

        Blessings and Bear hugs, m’love!

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  14. Holy shit, Ivy, you obviously still have work to do on this earth or you wouldn’t be here to tell us this story. I had a scary anesthesia incident when I had Emma and imagining that ramped up to an 11 on a scale of 10.
    Glad your eyeballs didn’t fall out.
    I’m with Lisa and didn’t realize you had that much hair. Isn’t it interesting how freeing it is to cut several inches (or ten) off your hair?

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  15. damn! you synchronisted my comment with your next (future to you as you wrote this/past to you as you read this Post)!
    I immediately thought of Ola the day I came back from my ruptured appendix adventure… she was happy to see me (of course) but a bit reserved while being totally focused on guarding me.

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    1. Doo doo doo doo…. it’s all about the time travel. Lol?
      I don’t know about Doug…maybe its his past , but he is not overly guard dog at these times. He is attached at the hip but I don’t think he’s guarding me as much as making sure I don’t leave him again. He becomes fairly demanding….unnecessary trips outside etc.. he starts misbehaving as well. He’s done this since we first got him. He was already old by then. I suppose it’s a separation anxiety.

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  16. I assumed your hair was like shoulder length and I’ve SEEN you on vidchat! WTF. I’m so glad your eyeballs didn’t fall out. And that you have a good doc with a sense of humor. And that you didn’t go to the light.
    And wow – Rich huh? That’s awesome!

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  17. Snark saves lives. Well that’s what I’m going with. I really wish migraines didn’t make hair hurt. Glad the haircut worked out.

    Who knew fruitcake could warm a heart like that? So much fantastic in that package.

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  18. Okay, I think my lawyer has enough evidence to sue now. lol You’re going to ruin my reputation if you keep this up. People will actually think I’m a nice guy after I’ve tried so hard to hide that. 🙂 I’m just glad that you enjoy them. I think of music as the gift that keeps on giving. It can bring back smiles, memories and good times once enjoyed. I love sharing it and again, am very happy you like the little collection. It was the least I could do after all the work you went through making the fruit cakes. So, lie back, close those eyes, and just enjoy! You deserve it!

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  19. You are something else. What a trooper to have such a week and recount it in such an entertaining — and funny — way. So glad that you obviously had a good medical team close by. Keep that amazing positive attitude. Hope you keep feeling stronger and stronger. Remember spring is out there somewhere.

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