Thousandth Time’s the Charm? Superfluous Nipples and the TToT!

“This is now the third time I have spoken with Health New England and the second time I have called the Mass Health Connector to get my insurance card number. For the past four months I have been charged for insurance, and no one has been slack in taking that payment from my account, yet I continue to be without health insurance. If you want me to have a stroke and really NEED my health insurance, you are certainly going about it in the correct way.”

“I’m sorry ma’am but the Health Connector hasn’t contacted us so we do not have you as an enrolled member of Health New England. You will have to call the Health Connector and talk to a supervisor to get them to send us the information.”

” LOOK! If I had a nickel for every supervisor I have spoken to at the Health Connector I would have a villa in France and could afford to have you people keep screwing me over. I apologize, but it is now official – I am no longer skillful – I am just cold angry! Give me your supervisor please…”

And so it went like a game of ping-pong until I called my state senator’s office and complained informing them of my intention to mention the State Health Connector not only at my next town meeting, but also in the letter I intended to write to the Boston Globe mentioning what an ineffective,  bureaucratic, impotent excuse for a government office they are. This was after John in Senator Warren’s office stated ” If they didn’t say you would have coverage in five to six days I would be willing to work on it.”

“So what would make you want to work on it, John? I am not alone! I am one of several people sitting in a chemo infusion room saying this is happening. This is the last thing any of these people need to be dealing with. Just because I MAY have health care in five days , although you would have a hard time convincing me of that, doesn’t mean anyone else will. ”

“Well, I will get this to someone who can at least look into it. In the mean time I suggest you talk to Senator Downing who is the senator for your area. ” 

Christopher in Senator Downing’s office, was very helpful even before I insinuated I had a better chance of growing a superfluous nipple in the middle of my forehead, than getting health insurance from the state of Massachusetts within the next five or six days. I mentioned this because I was supposed to have insurance some time in December and not being prone to zits, I can feel a small bump growing just above my eyes. Christopher is hopefully dealing with the problem as I write this and I expect to hear from him soon.

I was done several weeks ago with this mess Massachusetts calls health coverage. I have been more than patient for the past several years…yes you read it correctly…YEARS!  I no longer know what to do. Who do I complain to? Who will help? I have written to my senators. When it was Kennedy and a separate problem of pre-existing conditions, I must say his office was instrumental in helping me. Years later, when I contacted then Senator Kerry with a what is now THIS chronic insurance problem, I received a form letter making sure I knew he expected me to vote for him… FAT CHANCE MR. KERRY!

I could contact Mr. Obama however I think he may be a bit too busy to deal with my health care issues and I don’t think there is enough concealer in Massachusetts to cover up a nipple on my forehead and make me presentable enough to meet the President. I just don’t know where to turn. So to the newspapers I go.

Thankful #1: I can be ridiculously patient in the face of adversity… hypo grat: Am I too patient?

Thankful #2: I can write a scathing letter when I have to

Thankful #3: With a third and visible nipple maybe I will finally be attractive to “boob men.”

Thankful #4: I have a head on my shoulders even if I’m growing a superfluous nipple on it.

Thankful #5: I have friends ( thanks Susan, thanks Peyton)  who are willing to come to my aid in the realm of advocacy should I poop out before my goal is reached.

Thankful #6 : Doug. ALWAYS Doug.

Thankful #7: There are some people in government offices willing to step up to the plate.

Thankful #8: I had a therapy appointment of my own right after all this happened. I ranted ceaselessly.

Thankful #9: I am not so ill that I can’t stand up for myself.

Thankful #10 : Totally off topic… make sure you enter the contest cuz I hear the prize is awesome! Now git!

CONTEST LINKY!

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